Monday, July 12, 2010

The Koppel Gerard Coiffure

It occurred to me today, after stumbling across a picture of Erin Gray from Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, that in the 80s, somehow I think I was trying to covertly emulate the Gil Gerard character. You see, I had a massive freshman-year-in-high-school crush on Erin Gray. I was a geek coming from parochial school, going to the big public high school, knowing no one, and sporting what I used to think was the "Ted Koppel Hairdo". It wasn't Koppel's. In retrospect, it was Gil Gerard's.

The black and white thumbnail (left) was lifted from an old resume I used to send out in the 80s (in futile attempts to get a well paying summer job) that a good friend reminded me about last weekend. If I could get the hair do (and the "Member's Only" jacket) maybe I could land a woman like Colonel Wilma Deering too! The head of the United Space Federation's military forces, and awesome in low cut spandex... a 14 year old can only hope! And hope.. and hope... LOL!

Then, last Sunday, I saw a scene from Jurassic Park (which I had not seen in many years), wherein Dr. Ellie Sattler (aka Laura Dern, aka Dr DF in the 90s) was attending to a triceratops with gastro-intestinal distress... and yeah, there was some kind of learned-pattern / instinctual hard-wiring going on in the 80s and 90s inside my head.

You don't think Dr Desert Flower looks like Laura Dern? Once, in a Sam's Club in Bloomington Indiana, when Jurassic Park was playing on every single TV in the electronics aisle, an elderly redneck woman approached DFF and said "that's you!" pointing at the television screens, wanting an autograph!

And then of course, there's the Princess Di look-a-like declarers who insist DFF is a long lost twin sister of the former Princess of Wales, and I cannot really argue with them.

So, to reconstruct this theory: I adopted Gil Gerard's hair cut in the early 80s, to try and capture the attention of Col Wilma Deering initially, which then turned out later that I was married to Dr. Ellie Sattler before DDF had her actual doctorate. And little did I know, but she's the separated-at-birth twin of Diana Spencer... hmmm. At least I did not adopt Nicolas Cage's (Sailor Ripley) hair cut and ward-robe from Wild At Heart trying to woo Lula Fortune! LOL!

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