Monday, August 20, 2012

Tener Mi Culo Beso

Dr Desert Flower and I are celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary this year by staying at an all inclusive resort on the Mexican Yucatan peninsula that is on the beach, 25 miles from down town, with 3 security gates (the first gate was armed and formidable, the 2nd two were bureaucratic niceties).  It is not cheap, BUT, it is about $2000 less than trying to go to Hawaii for the same amount of time and staying on any of the less populated islands there. Oh, and it's "adults only" - no kids running around, crying, screaming, or taking up beach or pool chairs. And the alcohol...   it flows as fast as free bottles of water, which are ubiquitous here.

I've never stayed at an all inclusive resort before, so I had no idea of the level of ass kissing (tener mi culo beso) that was 'standard fare' at an all inclusive.  The company that runs this resort is named "Excellence" and every single staff member is trained and responsive to make sure that every single guest has an "excellent" time, addressing their every need for cold drinks, good food, fresh towels, a comfortable room, etc.  It's impressive that if you say anything - like "the mini fridge in the room is not really keeping the drinks cold" - that the staff Takes Action immediately.   We mentioned this Saturday, went to dinner, and came back to our room to find that they had changed out the mini-fridge to a new one while we were at dinner.  When you get up to go in the water, a beach attendant runs over to your lounge chair, and changes out the towels that are wrapped around the comfy cushions if they are wet or sand covered - at first I thought this was sort of excessive... but heck, it's nice to be catered to.

The bar tenders will make any drink you can imagine, with premium ingredients - Camus and Courvosier cognac, Johnny Walker Black, Jack Daniels, Absolute, Havanna 7 year rum, Don Julio tequila, etc etc etc,  Tips are not required, and you won't find a tip jar anywhere at an all inclusive, but I gave the bartender a 50 Peso note (about $4) and he calls me by name and asks what my wife and I would like to try next.  There's  a preponderance of the construction worker beer "Corona" here - I say "construction worker" because in Monterrey, where I have traveled for business 3 times previously, they said "in Mexico, the locals drink Modelo or Bohemia or Pacifico; Corona is cheap & nasty and only drank by the poor and low paid construction workers, day laborers (in Mexico!)".   Every bar here has Corona on tap, in bottle or cans, and it fills every minibar as well.  I avoid it for the headache producing swill that it is.  With so many other delicious libations around, it is easy to do.  =)

All the food is free, and it's pretty good. Each meal we've had here, either DDF or I had something we didn't like, and the other had something we liked.  I can't recommend the Chinese Spicy duck (last night) nor the French duck l'orange Friday night upon our arrival.  DDF's Mediterranean  vegetables at the 'Barcelona' restaurant were inedible Saturday night, but the sauteed chick and shrimp that came with it were tasty.  I've had succulent protein - hot wings, juicy ribs, yogurt, cheeses, hamburgers (no bun), shrimp cocktail, omelets, crust-less quiches - and DDF has had sushi, sashimi, pastas, seafood, tacos aand sandwiches - and have not been hungry once in 4 days.  There is a "dead spot" between 4 and 6pm where all the lunch places are closed and the dinner places have not yet opened, but that's more time to sit in hot tubs, cool bubbling hydro tubs, snorkel, swim, walk on the beach, and of course, drink more.

I need to end this post now, as yoga class is starting soon, and when I went Saturday, I learned a few new positions and breathing techniques.   So we're going back this morning, both DDF and I this time.

I'll try to post more this week, later about drink combinations I have created, as well as "white people problems" that DDF and I have thought of while here (like having a white cloth napkin while wearing dark pants - lol!).

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