Wednesday, September 3, 2008

RNC Rhetoric Drinking Game Suggestions

Watching a few minutes of RNC enthusiasm yesterday, I was struck with a few ideas of possible drinking games.

USA! USA! USA! Whenever the party faithful begin that nationalistic chant, you need to either finish your beer, or take a shot of Jack Daniels (not Jager! that crap's made in Europe!)

"Young Man Obama" - whenever references are made to Obama's age, you need to chug. You don't have to finish it, just chug most of it.

"Tax & Spend" - whenever this phrase is uttered, everyone making less than $40K a year needs to buy another round!

"America First!" - when this phrase is spoken, the LAST person to start chanting "USA! USA! USA!" needs to get everyone else another drink.

"Increase the size of government" - when RINOs (Republicans in name only) predict that Democrats will do this, despite having been in power in all three branches of government over the last 6 years, and 2 out of 3 for the last 8, everyone needs to take off (or pull up) their shirt, to show the size of chest (like a war chest) and then leave their shirt up, and over the back of their head, until the next time this is spoken. Also eligible for shirt reversal, would be "Big Government", "Welfare Queens", and "Entitlement".

and last but not least....

POW! Each time McCain's Prisoner of War years are mentioned, you're required to PUNCH your drinking buddy's upper arm or shoulder (the one that is not holding the beer, if you're sitting on nice furniture indoors) and yell "POW!" before POUNDING your drink. If you've got a pellet gun, you can shoot your neighbor in the leg or back or chest (face only, Cheney eligible), instead of punching them. But "POW!" still needs to be yelled.

Drink enough, and the RNC speakers will start to sound reasonable, logical, downright American. Patriots all!

USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

4 comments:

  1. Freaking classic Joe. That was the most ridiculous 45 minutes of my life. I am going to ask Cox for a refund.

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  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. C'mon Joe... You're missing a serious alcoholic opportunity with no drinking game to go with the oft mentioned 9/11.

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  4. I just figured, since "9/11" is Giuliani's mantra, and his RNC speech was better "in the original German" (snicker) that "neun elf" wouldn't go over as well. Zieg Heil!

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/213107.php

    http://www.thenation.com/doc/20020311/klinkner

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