Showing posts with label FSM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FSM. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

In A Dragon Based Economy, Geography Doesn't Matter

In a Dragon Based Economy, apparently geography doesn't really matter.  Or "everything you wanted to know about the Game of Thrones season premier, but we're too afraid to ask".
Dragonstone is near Jamie's feet, Kings Landing is 1/2 way to his sister & lover Cersei

I call it a "Dragon Based Economy" because that what John Oliver called it on Colbert's Late Night show twice last week.  "We're talking some serious dragon money" - when Last Week Tonight bought 5 wax presidents from a closing Ohio Presidential museum.  Game of Thrones is one of the Main anchors that brings in subscribers (and pirates) to HBO, along with Real Time (which I watch, every time it's on), The Leftovers (which I couldn't care less about), and Ballers (which I can't give even 1/2 a sh*t about no matter how hard I try).  Westworld was a good series, and in my mind, Needed to STOP when it stopped.  There's Zero Need to continue with Samurai Westworld, Outer Space Westworld, or Ancient Roman Westworld...  but the bean counters and non-creatives at HBO apparently disagree with my perspective and want to keep raking in the cash from zombified viewers.

Another Danish actor steal jobs from good Americans & Brits
Now, why do I state that "geography doesn't matter"?  Well, the newly usurping & murderous Lord of the Iron Born Euron Greyjoy (putting the "Ew!" in "Euron") shows up with an armada of "1000 ships" at Kings Landing, in an attempt to gain favor with Queen Cersei (and ask for her hand in marriage... ew!!! I think I just tasted some of my own vomit), but his massive fleet somehow doesn't run into the even more massive fleets of Greyjoy deserters, Unsullied warriors, 2nd Sons (I'm actually a 2nd son myself, heh heh), and the Dothraki Horde - not to mention 3 massive and very hungry dragons that have been flying air cover for the invading fleet - that Daenerys Targaryen is leading to the island of Dragonstone.  Dragonstone, per the maps of Westeros, is near the eastern mouth of the long bay that eventually leads to Kings Landing.  The Iron Islands, Pyke, are on the Western side of Westeros, north of Casterly Rock.  THERE IS NO Northern Passage, as global warming has not yet melted the ice caps north of the Seven Kingdoms as it already has in Canada and Russia on this world in this age, where Polar Bear mothers now have to swim for more than a 100 miles with their newly born cubs to reach the pack ice, where upwards of 90% of the cubs are drowning, exhausted, as they used to only have to swim a mile or 2 at most.  At least I got to see a Polar Bear in the zoo when I was a kid, before they all become extinct.

But human driven climate change aside, Ewwww-Euron's 1000 ships would have had to sail Down around the Southern end of Westeros, past Dorne, and then northward UP the Narrow Sea, side-by-side or just ahead / just behind Daenerys's even bigger fleet was sailing through, with 3 circling and hungry dragons who would have obliterated the 1000 Greyjoy ships just as they torched the slavers ships in Slaver's Bay several seasons ago, until the slavers finally surrendered and Daenerys took their ships for her crossing of the Narrow Sea.  I've included a handy screen shot from the episode where Cersei is standing in the middle of a courtyard painted as the map of Westeros, for your reference, above.  Both fleets could no co-exist in the same Narrow Sea at the same timer even within a few days of each other, due to their MASSIVE sizes and the remarkably slow pace that sail driven sea travel has when flying just one or 2 sails, and not a massive array of studding sails, spanker sails, royal, sky, moonraker, and top sails as Only Euron's flag ship tried to set (with aerodynamic inaccuracies, sorry special effects folks who were concerned more with style than substance).  "That which is dead can never die" ... no..  how about "that which is dumb cannot get dumber", or "that which is repulsive cannot get even more repulsive".  So Euron's travel to and appear in Kings Landing was not logistically possible, unless he somehow teleported or owned a T.A.R.D.I.S. with enough capacity to move his entire fleet instantaneously without running into Daenerys's fleet.


Sure, "The Twins" where they Freys slaughtered and then got slaughtered themselves ("poison is a woman's weapon") apparently divides the northern part of the Seven Kingdoms from the southern part, perhaps for lack of any small boats that could traverse the water way southeast of "The Twins", I can understand that.  But the waterway that "The Twins" crosses Does Not extend all the way to the west coast of Westeros, so there's no way Euron and his massive fleet could have sailed down it.

Geography aside, the Season 7 premier was pretty good.  Several other poignant observations I made in retrospect are as follows:

1) what's scarier than a whole horde of decomposing white walkers who can't be killed with steel weapons?  A horde of decomposing white walkers who have in their ranks ancient Giants whom they've killed and then resurrected as blue eyed white walkers before the giant corpses could be burnt.  Undead zombie giants are Far More Lethal than undead foot soldiers or undead calvary.  An undead giant could lob a spear the size of a telephone pole with a big nasty pointy end, far into the air (like the height of "The Wall" as happened several seasons ago when the Wildling Free Folk attacked "The Wall" with Giants at their side)... and such a spear could impale one of the precious 3 dragons, perhaps killing it.  Then... the Night King resurrects the dead dragon as a undead dragon...  and it kills the other two remaining dragons.  That would be Game Over, for Game of Thrones.  
What's worse than one white walker Giant? Three white walker Giants!
2) if you were not watching with closed captioning on (as we do in our house, with hearing impaired viewers  and for clarity), you would not know that the massively gray scaled hand that tried to reach out to Samwell Tarly was indeed the hand of Jorah Mormont (former Lord of Bear Island, then reluctant slave trader to keep his wife comfortable and provide "the lifestyle to which she was accustomed", then kidnapper of Tyrion and rebuked suitor of Daenerys).  Seems that Jorah made his way to Old Town to seek a cure for grayscale from the Maesters, but Westerosian medicine still didn't have a cure for that ailment.

3) if you've stolen the keys to the forbidden & locked up Maester reference library, and you have only a few seconds to lift an ancient book from the bizarrely chained shelves (was Old Town seismically active?), make sure you pick The Exact Tome that has the history of the Last Winter in it, that shows Precisely where a whole mountain of Dragon Glass is on the island of Dragonstone (at the mouth of the bay that leads right to Kings Landing)... it just seems rather far fetched to me, as I am old enough to remember going to the library Before there was a searchable internet, and you had to use the card catalogue, or the headache inducing microfiche, and you spent hours and hours searching to find just one or two gems that you could include in a bibliography.  There was no Google, Yahoo, Bing, Lycos,  Ask Jeeves, AltaVista, Infoseek, or Webcrawler back when I was in school.  If you wanted to find a book in a library, you had to search for it, long and hard, and hope you got lucky and it wasn't checked out when you finally located it.  Samwell Tarly grabs it The First Pick, while under pressure of being discovered a few seconds later by the next Maester who walks in.  Sure... let's keep suspending disbelief.
Voted most likely to be killed by White Walkers by his Free Folk High School

This should be a good season.  Let the white walkers come... depose the angry Cersei who has no allies (let Arya do it, gleefully)... make a bunch of weapons out of Dragonstone's Dragon Glass cache... wipe out the Greyjoys from the surface of the sea and have their octopus god devour their rotting remains... let the alternative lifestyle Dorne and Greyjoy girls enjoy themselves together... sacrifice the Free Folk & their leader Tormund Giantsbane to the white walker hordes just as corporate America does to the middle class without blinking an eye... have Brienne take out The Mountain as she took out his little brother and then she and Jaime can get together... let Samwell Tarly save the day with his book-learnin... and let Jon Snow get it on with his 1/2 sister Daenerys once the Starks and Daenerys armies band together to fight the White Walker horde.  I can't care about Baelish, Bran, Sansa, Qyburn, Podrick, man-bun Thoros or one eyed Beric very much at all.  Sure, Martin can kill off most of the main characters and elevate any of these lesser roles if he wants to... but... that would hurt the franchise at this point, and HBO wants to keep making money.  Please just let it be one or two more seasons... and not 4 or 5 more, or it'll go on far too long as the books have.


Wednesday, June 29, 2016

31 Scientific Societies Agree...

Climate Deniers - much like birthers - hate facts but really hate the Scientific Method even more.  Climate Deniers can make up their own facts, and then cite fringe scientists or paid corporate lobbyist studies to reinforce their opinion-pushed-as-fact, that agrees with the idealogical narrative they’ve engrained in their own psyche.  Sadly for them though, the Scientific Method doesn’t care which side of the ideological fence you might be on, or if you’re liberal or conservative… it doesn’t matter.  What matters is that your experiment is reproducible, your instruments are calibrated, and that you didn’t falsify any of your findings.  If your experiment is reproducible, then theories can then be tested and if they’re true, then they’re widely accepted by the scientific community. 

So yesterday, the American Association for the Advancement of Science (AAAS) sent a letter to the United States Congress, signed on by 31 different scientific organizations, that stated Climate Change is real and that greenhouse gases (CO2 and chlorofluorocarbons) emitted by human activity are the largest driver of Climate Change.  This is a more forceful version of the 2009 letter to Congress that 19 major scientific societies signed… and which Congress promptly ignored.  

The 31 scientific societies on the 2016 letter include:
American Association for the Advancement of Science American Chemical Society
American Geophysical Union
American Institute of Biological Sciences 
American Meteorological Society
American Public Health Association
American Society of Agronomy
American Society of Ichthyologists and Herpetologists American Society of Naturalists 
American Society of Plant Biologists
American Statistical Association
Association for the Sciences of Limnology and Oceanography Association for Tropical Biology and Conservation Association of Ecosystem Research Centers
BioQUEST Curriculum Consortium
Botanical Society of America
Consortium for Ocean Leadership
Crop Science Society of America
Ecological Society of America
Entomological Society of America
Geological Society of America
National Association of Marine Laboratories
Natural Science Collections Alliance
Organization of Biological Field Stations
Society for Industrial and Applied Mathematics
Society for Mathematical Biology
Society for the Study of Amphibians and Reptiles
Society of Nematologists
Society of Systematic Biologists
Soil Science Society of America
University Corporation for Atmospheric Research 

Read the letter here, for yourself:

“Dear Members of Congress, 
We, as leaders of major scientific organizations, write to remind you of the consensus scientific view of climate change. 
Observations throughout the world make it clear that climate change is occurring, and rigorous scientific research concludes that the greenhouse gases emitted by human activities are the primary driver. This conclusion is based on multiple independent lines of evidence and the vast body of peer-reviewed science. 
There is strong evidence that ongoing climate change is having broad negative impacts on society, including the global economy, natural resources, and human health. For the United States, climate change impacts include greater threats of extreme weather events, sea level rise, and increased risk of regional water scarcity, heat waves, wildfires, and the disturbance of biological systems. The severity of climate change impacts is increasing and is expected to increase substantially in the coming decades.1 
To reduce the risk of the most severe impacts of climate change, greenhouse gas emissions must be substantially reduced. In addition, adaptation is necessary to address unavoidable consequences for human health and safety, food security, water availability, and national security, among others. 
We, in the scientific community, are prepared to work with you on the scientific issues important to your deliberations as you seek to address the challenges of our changing climate. “

Problem is, the Republican led congress doesn’t want to work with real scientists.  It derides and dismisses them, denying the scientific community’s CONSENSUS, clinging to a corporate profit driven model of increased compulsory consumption.  


Maybe it’s a good thing I don’t have grandchildren…  or possibly never will… since we are either AT the tipping point currently, or far beyond the tipping point globally… and since I am not one of the wealthiest 1% of Western Civilization I won’t be the one building a well stocked, well filtered, fully independent & sustainable for millennia under-ground bunker complex where my progeny could live & work & go about life after the seas rise, the fish & plants & pollenating insects all die, and hordes of angry surviving scavengers sift through the hell-scape that used to be Earth as they absorb massive amounts of UV from Sun without an ozone layer to filter it, breathing air with a significantly reduced oxygen content, and living much shorter life spans due to the toxin build up and cancer from the unmitigated UV (UV and DNA are not very compatible).  Il faut voir.  

Saturday, July 4, 2015

First 4th of July in N.SD For Us


I just finished hanging up my American Flag outside my home here in N.SD County, for the very first time.  Surrounded by lavender, hibiscus, mandevilla, palm trees, japonica, oleander, humming bird feeders, Allen's & Roufus & Anna's hummingbirds, and flapping gently in the 72F, 5 mph, intermittent breeze 3 miles from the ocean, it struck me as particularly beautiful... even with the gray over-cast sky.


I am appreciative that I live in a country where I can speak English, and not German (link here) - and English is Still spoken around the world by more people than any other language who control more of the world's capital and decisioning making  (even with nearly 1.4 Billion Chinese, not all of whom speak Mandarin), with the most influence internationally;
We hope to replace this grass with mulch and rock in the next 2 months, with the drought

[I once, while waiting for my company car to pick me up, observed a French business man try and check out of a very poorly run South Korea hotel in Changwon, "Hotel International" - a total pit, very unpleasant, highly NOT recommended for anyone who wants a pleasant stay -  using only French.  The poor man tried and tried, but the hotel clerk just looked blankly back at him, until in broken English, and with great venom & distaste in his pronunciation, he was able to pay his bill and leave the wretched hotel].

I have been able to live & work in multiple states, without the central government approving it (unlike my friends in China, who need central approval to relocate), [link here] going from Indiana, to South Carolina, then back to Indiana, then back to South Carolina 3 years later; then to Arizona for 5, OC California for 2.5, and now Northern San Diego County, where I hope I don't have to move again any time soon.

In this country, I don't have religious fundamentalists telling me how I can dress, what I can eat & drink, and what kind of music I am allowed to play in my home without head phones, like the Basiji do in Iran and the Mutaween do in Saudi Arabia.

In this country I don't have to worry that we are on the brink of national bankruptcy, as the Republicans & many Libertarians kept screaming we were when President Obama took office (yes months earlier, in the same financial conditions under Bush, no one on the right seemed to notice or care about a growing national debt - a debt which the Democrats have once again substantially paid down after the Republicans ran it up... again)... and it is not Greece with radicals on both the left and right rioting in the streets because their government has not had a spine to be able to make any hard choices and implement any austerity effectively for the last 4 bankruptcies.

America has its problems, but it is still a pretty damn good place to live & work and raise a family.  I am grateful to the men & women in the US military who have fought to keep us free, as well as grateful to the Federal leaders (Presidents, Secretaries of State, Senators, etc) who have kept us OUT of wars over the centuries making the spilling of the blood of our military unnecessary (Sorry Lindsey & McCain, we Don't need to bomb Iran and [what's left of] Syria and everywhere else that makes you wet your bed).  It's an English speaking, free movement of labor & capital (relatively, Joe M) =-) , pleasant country where peacocks can picnic wherever they please... "freedom baby, that's what it's all about!" [Freedumb Weekend Aloft, Greenville SC, 1992, yelled by a drunk redneck next to a fully armed A-10 warthog, at Donaldson Center].

Happy Fourth of July to everyone, no matter where you live!

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Biggest Hawk's Fan, Left Out In The Cold

I was amused by this Yahoo News story this afternoon (link), that the brachiosaurus outside Chicago's Field Museum (an AWESOME museum, in my book) will not be wearing the world's largest BlackHawk's jersey for the Stanley Cup finals (starting tonight) because the previous jersey 'took a beating from climate change and the harsh weather'.

I always loved the brachiosaurus as a kid...  it was...  back then...   the largest land animal ever (before Seismosaurus and other behemoths ousted it)... and Spielberg liked it so much he had it in Jurassic Park.  Too bad it'll be left out in the cold this year.

Monday, June 2, 2014

Awesome at His Job

Neil deGrasse Tyson is awesome as the host of Cosmos.  Each and every episode, revisited from Carl Sagan's original series, is marvelously presented.  Awesome graphics, pitch perfect writing, and precise delivery.  A "spokes person for the sane", a "voice of reason", Neil is the perfectly approachable, affable, charismatic scientist showing the common man who knows nothing about science what is really happening in the world, the universe, throughout time.

And no, it's not 6000 years old.  But if you want to believe that, that's fine for you to believe, just don't push that belief into the science class room, or onto my or my friends' kids, or grand kids.  A belief is not a fact.  And if facts contradict or challenge your beliefs, then that's a problem you have to grapple with, not I.  I trust in the facts, as peer reviewed and tried and tested, proven by controlled experiments.

And Seth MacFarlane...  you are a crazy, twisted, bizarre man, but thank you for funding the Cosmos revival.  Perhaps it is some kind of "penance" for having created Peter Griffin... I don't know.  =)


Thursday, May 1, 2014

Ridiculously Resilient Ridge

It's been warm here in Southern California this week. 90 degree temperatures in April are not "normal", but it appears we all will need to start getting used to it from what I'm reading on the Weather Underground blog.

When we were living in Phoenix, I used to have a morning ritual where I went around the house opening up windows and the 9 foot tall front door (leaving the zombie-proof security screen door closed) to get cool morning air into the house before the Sonoran Desert furnace kicked in to raise temperatures into the triple digits around 9 or 10am.  With the recent Southern California heat wave, I've renewed this ritual in our Orange County home.  Weather Underground has a station that is less than a mile from my house, and is about 75 feet lower in elevation than me, so its temperature / humidity / wind / rain data is very local and relevant (KCALAGUN22).  The site's graphic temperature-over-time displays are pretty cool as well.

But what really caught my attention this morning was a story on the lower right margin with a hot link: California Drought/Polar Vortex Jet Stream Pattern Linked to Global Warming
Dr Jeff Masters (a PhD, all that book learnin'...  what does he know anyways) pointed out a very detailed paper by S.-Y. Simon Wang of Utah State University, published in Geophysical Research Letters entitled "Probable causes of the abnormal ridge accompanying the 2013-14 California drought: ENSO precursor and anthropogenic warming footprint" (link here).  I am sure Fox News devotees will decry and deny this as "junk science" or liberal elitist 'the sky is falling' chicken-littleism.  But actually...   the sky is not falling.  The "Ridiculously Resilient Ridge" of high pressure is keeping any rain from falling, for long periods of time - significantly long periods of time from the geological record.

But what do I know?  I'm just a dumb old engineer that no one listens to anymore anyways.  Happy Thursday to everyone.

Dr Master's has an Excellent list of relevant links for further reading at the end of his article.  (applying that whole peer reviewed, verifiably tested accuracy, thorough & rigorous scientific method again...  instead of just believing what Rupert Murdoch tells him to believe)  If you want to completely depress yourself, and have hours of spare time to read them, browse through the long list.

Friday, February 28, 2014

Sorry Denying Fools, There's Still A Drought

Orange County is one of the most affluent regions of America, and many of its well off citizens spew no shortage of effluent from their mouths about things they do not understand - either willfully or ignorantly.  When I hear some elderly, affluent man, talking to his girl friend / daughter on a walking path in a posh coastal community (like Dana Point's Strand Beach) and he says "They say on a scale of 1 to 10, that this drought is an 11, but then it rained. They don't know anything! Where I live up in Los Angeles County, they have weekend water restrictions, and you can only water on Monday, Wednesday and Friday (dagnabit!).  There's no water shortage, they just need to stop dumping it in the rivers for all them damn fish and give it to the farmers and their farms instead!" ...when I hear such mis-informed, incorrect, misguided statements coming from an elderly man, it really makes me lose respect for 'the greatest generation.'  No Brokaw, this guy was not among them.


There are many really smart, factually well informed retired persons.  I correspond via email with many of them.  I strike up conversations with some of them in person when I am at a grocery store, concert, or family gathering.  But it seems that the (wealthier they are + the older they are)  x (the more geographically concentrated with other wealthy retirees they are) = (the more willfully ignorant & misinformed they are).  As Louis C.K. once said: “A 55 year-old garbage man is a million times smarter than a 28 year-old with three Ph.D.s, especially smarter than him.”


If you are a frequent visitor to JustJoeP, you know I am a fan of rain.  I write about it Often (link here). I used to play in it as a kid.  I missed having it frequently when I lived in Arizona for 5 years.  Rain (in moderation) helps things grow, refills reservoirs, brings life to places that were rather barren previously.  Rain is good.  California is in a HUGE drought, that has been more severe than any drought in recorded 120 year history in California (here the DATA: link)
or, if you don't like embeds:
https://www.ncdc.noaa.gov/temp-and-precip/ranks.php?periods%5B%5D=12&parameter=pcp&state=4&div=0&year=2014&month=1#ranks-form
Now, if Americans scored better on basic math aptitude tests, they'd be able to see that "6 inches" is smaller than "22 inches".  And if they scored better on English and Language aptitude tests, they'd know that "Driest to Date" does not mean "bring a chapstick & some lube when you pick me up tonight to go out for dinner".

So when there's an intense storm that sweeps into a drought stricken area, as all of Southern & Central California are drought stricken, and it drops a few inches of rain (1 or 2 or 3 inches, all numbers still much less than the 16 inches we never got last year), the drought is still not over.  It doesn't even become a mini-drought.  It's still a very severe drought.  We'd need 6 more of these massive storms to come through, and dump just as much rain (if it ends up being 3 inches, by the time it is all over Sunday - we got a 'whopping' 0.96 inches this morning... or...  about 15 more of these "1 inch" storms would be needed, for the Faux News watchers who can't do math).


Sure, the weather radar was all angry & red this morning, for about 20 minutes.  Then it passed, and the birds started singing again.  Some drizzle came, some "green radar" rain came, and then it all subsided again.  It's a very wet world outside right now, but we are still in a severe drought.

Just because it snowed in the Midwest & North East today doesn't mean there's no such thing as climate change.  Climate Change, by definition, Will Cause More Severe Fluctuations.

Tell the English citizens living along the Thames that the current variation is "normal".  Tell the farmers in Bakersfield CA that the lack of rainfall is normal.  Tell the polar bears who don't have any ice aged more than 6 months old from which to hunt seals.  Tell the Australians who had record floods last year.  Local weather events Do Not contradict over-all climate change trends.  They reinforce it.  Deny it all you want, it doesn't mean it will go away or that it is not true.

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Glorious Laguna Sunrises

December 13th's Sunrise

One of the nice things about the short December days in Southern California, and having to wake up before dawn to go to work - and work in a home office whose window that faces East - South East, is that You Know when dawn arrives.  You've already been working for 30 minutes or an hour, and then the darkness outside begins to gradually diminish. The birds start singing to each other.  The rest of the world begins to arise.  And since it is December, there's very likely some moisture in the air over Southern Orange County, and the cloud formations enhance the sunrise even more spectacularly than the setting sun can at dusk.  I've been lucky enough to see several remarkable sunrises this month, outside my window, just 3 feet to the right of my computer monitor.
Dec 12th's Sunrise


Ramen
This last week was my final full week of work this year, as I accrued substantial amounts of vacation that I've not taken.  I'll still work an occasional 1/2 day here or there in the next 3 weeks to catch up on emails and time cards and deal with those who don't plan very well...  but I'm essentially "checked out" for the rest of the year.  Circadian rhythms still have me getting up at 4am, but rolling over and going back to sleep until 7am was a wonderful experience this morning.

His Noodley Majesty the Flying Spaghetti Monster made an appearance in the sky to bless my morning, on December 12th, catching my eye.  It's been a long time since He's shown Himself to a mere mortal like myself, but I was honored to be able to be a witness to His glory.  Ramen!
FSM in the sky above Laguna Hills, December 12th 2013
I had also never seen such a small, localized, independent cloud burst in California, or anywhere else.  Atmospheric conditions with dew point, winds, and the dawn's initial solar heating to drive the distinctive "tendrils" of rain from not just one manifestation of the FSM, but 1/2 a dozen of His likenesses across the morning sky, some smaller or further away, but all with the same rain-indicative geometry.
Witnessing a glorious sunrise and being blessed with a sighting of the FSM energized my morning on the 12th, and put me in one of the best moods for a work day that I've been in all year.  I feel priviledged and honored to be able to share these images with you, the visitors to JustJoeP.  Be well.
In the center of this image, you can see a black bird flying, from the SE towards the NW.  This happens EVERY Dawn, in large murders as well as singular individuals.  EVERY dusk, the birds make a return journey, from NW to SE.  What drives this daily migration, I have no clue, but it is as repeatable as the arrival or dawn & dusk are.

Monday, December 9, 2013

Fiskars Reel Mower Real Deal

When we moved into this house, as part of the Closing agreement, the sellers agreed to "keep on" the pool service and the lawn service guys.  The sellers were original owners, and had been renting to 'questionable quality' renters for 2 years who had not been maintaining the pool and yard so well.  After the renter's lease ended this summer, the sellers re-instated their pool and yard guys and told them they'd stay one with whoever bought the house, at least for the first month - as the sellers were paying.

 Dr Desert Flower and I figured we'd "test drive" the lawn and pool guys, and see how well they do, what their prices were, and maybe keep them around.  When the lawn guy would come after the pool guy, I'd spend a good 20 or 30 minutes manually skimming out grass and weed clippings out of the pool, every Tuesday in October.  When the lawn guy would come before the pool guy, I let the hired pool guy do the skimming, but regardless, the lawn guy could not keep his weed whacker and mower from jettisoning copious amounts of biomass into the pool.  On top of that, he never weeded, the lawn was increasingly filling up with crab grass and dandelions, and he trimmed none of the many bushes and hedges.  I could not justify keeping around a lawn guy for $80 a month who did 5 minutes of mowing, 10 minutes of weed whacking, and 5 minutes of leaf blowing, to be gone in less than 1/2 an hour and who caused me 30 minutes of needless pool skimming (the pool guy began coming earlier and earlier on Tuesdays; but we let him go too, since as a educated scientist and engineer power couple, if we can't regulate chlorine ion concentration, pH, and water hardness / stabilizer, even after taking a combined 4 years of chemistry classes, then we needed to remove ourselves from the gene pool).  I bid the lawn guy adios, gave him a huge bag of guava, and told him I'd give him a call in 2014 if the lawn was too much for me to handle.

The day before I'd spoken to him, my new Fiskars Stay Sharp Max 18 inch push reel mower (6201) model # 62016935J Home Depot SKU # 605931, internet SKU 202563265 had arrived.  I put it together in my garage with a simple allen head screw driver in less than 5 minutes.  Very straightforward and logical.  No adjustments were needed, and it was ready to cut.  $199 was my investment (free shipping) and I was ready to try out my new human powered reel mower.

5 days later I was briskly pushing my mower through my small lawn when one of the front wheels Sheared Off a sprinkler head, and then 10 seconds later, I bent a 2nd head.  "Be more careful Joe!" I reprimanded myself and added "Don't mow the lawn near dusk when it is hard to see!"  I turned off my sprinkler system so it wouldn't erupt the following morning, and broke out my shovel and mini-pick-axe.  Took 20 minutes to repair the damaged heads the next day, and I reinstalled shorter heads with pop-ups that won't get caught by the mower.   A month later, I KNOW where all the heads are now, and I avoid them completely.

Originally I thought I'd get the grass clipping bag attachment, but it was an additional $50 and it looked cumbersome.  In retrospect, I am Very Glad I DID NOT get it, since it would have made turning and maneuvering the mower very difficult and occluded visibility tremendously, virtually guaranteeing more sprinkler head and other injuries.  Plus, my lawn is so small, I don't need to "catch" the clippings - remember, the lawn guy did it in less than 5 minutes with a gas powered mower.  I take 15 minutes, and do a double 'cross hatch' in that time, walking briskly to keep the blades spinning rapidly.

The Stay Sharp has a built in fly wheel that works really nicely.  In accordance with the multiple online reviews I read before buying, it Does Not cut weeds or mulch leaves.  Those need to be removed by hand, or chemically.  It cuts grass very nicely.  It is easily dried by 20 or 30 seconds of brisk walking along the side walk to get the blades spinning up to wind turbine airfoil speeds.  The handle "folds" or rather "leans vertically for storage" conveniently so that it takes up a very small footprint in my garage.  The mower is the most expensive and most mechanically intense Fiskars product I've purchased or used, but it does not disappoint.  Like all my previous Fiskars cutting tools, it is durable, intuitive, high quality, straight forward, easy-to-use.  I am looking forward to getting a lifetime of use out of it.

And yes, it IS possible to cut grass and weed whack and NOT jettison the clippings into the pool.  It takes some practice, and the first time I put a handful in by accident, but the 2nd and third grass cuttings and weed trimmings (via Ryobi, more on that later) left no more than 2 or 3 blades of grass each time to be fished out of the pool.  It just takes an understanding of physics, momentum, and the time and care necessary to intentionally not send bits of lawn and plant matter into the pool.

Now if just a few of my neighbors could embrace reel mower technology...  Saturday mornings at 7am would be so much quieter all around the neighborhood!

Sunday, August 18, 2013

What I Learned From Mary Roach's Gulp

Last weekend, while sitting at Salt Creek Beach on Sunday afternoon with my lovely wife, drinking a subtly rum spiked adult beverage, watching the waves washing ashore, pelicans fishing in the shallows, tourists body boarding without wetsuits, and 100s of people passing by having a wonderful beach day, I finished reading Mary Roach's Gulp, Adventures on the Alimentary Canal.  (for reference ISBN 978-0-393-08157-2).  It was interesting, hilarious, informative, and amazing well written.

I read it in hard back - since electronic devices in beach sunlight often have glare issues, and besides, I read slowly and would consume massive amounts of battery life.  I've found that Roach is now one of my favorite authors.  Her writing style "suits me" very well as an intelligent reader, and I thorough enjoyed digesting (pun absolutely intended) her work.  Gulp will not be the last book I read penned by her.  Next I will read Bonk, and then maybe Stiff.

Now, remember when you were back in grade school, or middle school, and you had to do a "book report" and turn it in for a grade?  I liked doing some book reports, as the material was sometimes enjoyable, but I loathed doing book reports on subjects which did not interest me.  Eating (and what the body does with and to the food we put into ourselves) has always interested me, and has, in fact, been a life long passion of mine as well as a subject that warrants scientific study.  Mary's done that research, handily, and thoroughly.

So what follows here, are the notes I took while (and after) reading Gulp.  These were not a "chore" they were things that I found fascinating, interesting, or just very cool.  They are not intended to be any kind of copyright infringement, but rather, a quick way to "index" and 'key word search" on a hard back book, via blog.  They are also intended to get other people to go out and read Roach's work, not dissuade them from doing so.  The notes below are by far NOT comprehensive (and they're pretty disorganized) but they are what I liked and found noteworthy.  =)


Things I learned from Gulp:

Aerobacter & H.eutropha bacteria slurry is proven inedible by humans (1968)

Only 5 to 10% of the air we breathe reaches the olfactory epithelium at the roof of the nasal cavity.

5 tastes humans perceive:  sweet, bitter, salty, sour and (I did not know) umami (brothy). 

Bad Olive Oil tastes (from the tasting wheel) include:  baby diapers, manure, vomit, bad salami, sewer dregs, pig farm waste pond.  Yummy!

Cadaver sniffing dogs are sniffing for cadaverine.

Liver is the most appealing dog food palatant, to dogs (and some humans, as well!).

The Inuit Games have indoor competitions like Ear Lift, and Mouth Pull.

Inuit eat a natural diet of raw organs - they leave the muscle tissue alone for the most part - far too tough, and has little nutritional value.  

For fruits and vegetables in the Arctic, Inuits let the caribou eat the lichens & moss, and then eat the caribou's stomach and contents after it's been partially digested.  A caribou stomach can be considered as "two servings of fruits or vegetables". 

Clara Davis did a study in the 1930s with orphaned babies to see what they would eat given choices, before learning from any adult.  Most desired by babies:  bone marrow, followed by brains and sweetbreads.   Shunned by babies:  liver, kidneys, 10 different veggies, haddock, and pineapple. 

Raw Narwhale skin ("Muktuk") tastes like a combination of chicken skin and pork rinds.  

Meat Industry vernacular includes the following terms I had never heard of before:
plunks - thoracic viscera, heart, lungs, trachea
melts - spleens
paunch - rumens
slunks - unborn calves (play THOSE in Scrabble!   Ha!)

trichobezoars - human hair balls  (ew!) and April 27th is Hair Ball Awareness Day!

Babies prefer milk that smells like garlic over milk that doesn't. (in scientific studies)

Human hair, is Kosher  (but ew!) and contains up to 14% L-cysteine, which is also founding bird skin (chicken soup).

Horace Fletcher (creator of the mastication practice of "Fletcherism", was a tedious person and a bad scientist.

Dr William Beaumont took advantage of Canadian Alexis St.Martin and his fistulated stomach, for decades.

Italian saliva scientists (like Erika Silletti) can't stand Dutch food, and go grocery shopping in Germany where they can pick up ingredients for home cooked Italian meals.

There are two kinds of saliva - stimulated and unstimulated.  Stimulated makes up 70 to 90% of the saliva a person produced in a day.  Unstimulated keeps down bacteria and fights disease, creating long amino acid chains (mucins) as well as regulating pH.  

The parotid glands are our faithful servants, making saliva whenever we eat, no matter what it is, trying to help us get it down.  

People affected by Sjögren's syndrome have damaged salivary glands and don't make saliva, suffer from chronic dry mouth. Their teeth wind up becoming soft and rotting out.

Babies have salivary lipase to break down milk fat, but as they get older, the lipase moves into their gut and out of their saliva.  

At the American Cleaning Institute, there are actually a Dr Luis Spitz, and a consultant Keith Grime!

Fabric Softeners work by partially digesting the fibers of your clothes, to make them less rigid, rounder, seemingly "softer"  (ew!)

Inter-museum Conservation Association conservators use spit when restoring clay works of art.  

Incubated Saliva smells worse than fishy amines (rank vaginal odor), dirty feet, or any other human by product that one can attempt to de-odorize.

Inuit parents and grand parents siphon nose snot from their children's and grand children's noses by oral suction - sucking the snot out of them.

Inuit nose rubbing is called "kunik"

When a Brahmin comes in contact with crow dropping, the ritual purification is "1000 and one baths".

The World Wide Web has far more mucilaginous strands that are not-safe-for-work (NSFW), compared to scientific references about the frothiness of protein.

Saliva kills more kinds and greater numbers of bacteria than does mouthwash.  Use mouthwash for the rinsing and taste, but don't fool yourself that it is killing more bacteria than your natural saliva.  It can't.  There are more strains of bacteria that live ON Other bacteria in your mouth, than the culture-able strains that live in most human mouths.  

In any crowd, approximately 20% of the people in that crowd will pick their nose.  Doctors, students, religious, managers…  it doesn't matter. (again, studied by scientists)

The medical perforative "quack" is derived from the German quacksalber which Merck used to promote as an antisyphilitic remedy.

In the New Testament of Mark, Jesus uses spittle to treat the blindness of a man, but in Luke and Matthew, they leave out that story entirely.  The spittle treatment was only partially effective, as Mark reported the man say "people who looked like trees" walking around.

There are three types of fingerprints:
loop - 65%, whorl (30%), and arch (5%)
There are 4 types of oral processing styles for semi solid foods like custard or yogurt:
simple (50%), taster (20%), manipulator (17%) and tongued (13%).  

A human's teeth can sense something as small as 10 microns.

When Tom Little was a child, he swallowed hot clam chowder in 1895 and burnt his throat shut, so that a doctor had to give him a fistula in his stomach into which pre chewed food was poured via a funnel. Beer however, was poured straight into the funnel, without chewing.  If he put the food straight into the funnel without chewing, Tom was not satisfied, and still felt hungry.  

A high-viscosity bolus travels down the esophagus at approximately the same speed as a fast tortoise; 0.22 mph.  

When patients suffer from dysphagia, and they have to chose between being able to talk, or being able to chew and eat, they usually opt to have their voice box (larynx) removed and become mute, rather than not being able to chew their food and swallow - so strong is the human desire to chew and taste and swallow!

The snapping of a chip sends sound waves at 300 meters per second. Humans prefer to hear it at 90 to 100 decibels as they chew.  (340 m/s = speed of sound at sea level)

An orca's fore-stomach has been measured to be 5 feet x 7 feet, unstretched.  A 24 ft killer whale was once dissected by E.J. Slijper, to reveal 14 seals & 13 porposies (presumably adolescents or very small young).  

Mary's wit shows clearly in sentences about seamen, sperm whales, suction and swallowing…  =)

An unrestrained 10 pound dog will impact your car's windshield with 500 lbs of force in a 50 mph head on collision. 500 lbs of force is also the compressive force exerted by a birds gizzard on what it swallows, as evidenced by René Réaumur in 1752.

Claude Bernard used to vivisection experiments on dogs in 1855, that were so horrific, bizarre, and unnecessary, that his wife Marie Françoise "Fanny" Bernard eventually left him in 1870 and founded an anti-vivisection society.

After a person dies, their stomach's acids continue to digest, and without the protective mucosal lining of the stomach being relined every three days, the stomach will begin to "digest itself".  In warmer climates, the heat accelerates the pace.  

Per anum and "per annum" are VERY different in meaning.  Just one little "n" in the middle  =)  "10% interest per anum" would be extremely hilarious!

pylorus = the stomach-to-intestine valve

A cow's rumen is the size of a 30 gallon trash can.

TLESR = transient lower esophageal sphincter relaxation  (burp)

A Liverpool woman in 1984 died when her stomach ruptured, after she only ate
2 pounds of kidneys, 1.3 lbs of liver, 1/2 a pound of steak, 2 eggs, 1 lb of cheese, 1/2 pound of mushrooms, 2 lbs of carrots, head of cauliflower, two slices of bread, 10 peaches, 4 pears, 2 apples, 4 bananas, 2 lbs of plums, 2 lbs of grapes, and 2 glasses of mile; 19 lbs in all.

Takeru Kobayashi nearly beat her record (and lived) by eating 18 lbs of cow brains in 15 minutes, in an eating competition.  

Dyspepsia - stomach pains after eating (typical American weekend & buffet syndrome)

Bristol Stool Scale - actually used "type" excrement

Defecography - "as close to pornography as medicine will come" - gastroenterologist Mike Jones

If you refuse to take a meal on an international flight (especially from Columbia or Bolivia to the US) you will probably be interviewed by the DEA when you land in the US.  Drug smugglers who have swallowed balloons of narcotics avoid eating and drinking to slow down the movement of their cargo through their digestive tracts.

alvine - of or relating to bowel blockages, coined by orthopedist Dr Gregory Alvine.

CH4 and H2 are explosive in concentrations higher than 4 to 5 percent.  Liquid Manure pits can be naturally topped with as much as much as 60% frothy methane.

Up to 80% of flatus is hydrogen (not methane).  Only 1/3 of humans harbor gut bacteria that makes methane.

NASA space suits recirculate the air inside of them 3 times each minute, including an astronaut's flatus  =P

Grumous = clotted or lumpy
glabrous = smooth and hairless
periblepsis = wild look of delirium
maculate = spotted

People (usually women) who hold in their flatus re-absorb a great deal of that 80% hydrogen into their blood, which they then breathe out through their mouths.

Pythons and Boas have cecums, just as horses, rabbits, and koalas do.  The constrictors use it to digest the remnants of their prey's vegetarian diets, using bacteria to break down the vegetable matter into nutrients, and…   hydrogen.  Daenerys Stormborn exaggerates her motherhood  =)

Beano gives away wind breakers as promotional items…  sponsors a hot air balloon in races, and has cans of beans in their break room at AkPharma.   

Michael Levitt has published 34 papers on flatus.  He's identified that it is trapped methane that makes floaters (not fiber or fat), he invented the hydrogen breath analyzer, and identified the 3 main chemicals that make flatus smell:  hydrogen sulfide, methanethiol, and dimethyl sulfide, in most all humans (he reversed engineered them with chemical supply house gases, until the gas chromatograph signatures matched).  

Devrom's active ingredient is bismuth subgallate - and it does not irritate the gut, unlike the irritating bismuth that Pepto-bismol uses. Devrom absorbs flatus odor.  I think I may be giving out Devrom to my extended family in Chicago next Christmas!!!

Rural Sudanese eat fermented (decomposing) caterpillar, frog, and heifer urine.  mmmmm yummy!  Can we vacation in the Sudan, please!?!?

Hydrogen sulfide is detectable by the human nose from <1 ppm to 150 ppm.  Above 150 ppm it paralyzes the olfactory nerves, and can kill you.   Human flatus is generally 1 to 3 ppm H2S.

Rats who eat their own feces (autocoprophagy) grow 3x as fast as rats who are restarted from eating their own feces (collars and corsets had to be employed to keep the rats from eating it as it came out, before it could fall through a grated floor.).  Vitamins B5, B7, B12, K, thiamine, riboflavin, and essential fatty acids made in the lower GI tract of the rats.  

Cows can re-swallow their food as much as 40 times - Cecotrophy, pseudo-rumination.

Indonesian civets eat coffee beans that are then excreted, and gathered by Indonesian humans, to see for exotic coffees that are $200/ lb.  (another reason to switch to tea)

Only cnidarians (sea anemones and jelly fish) eat and defecate out of the same orifice.  (pronounced "nidarians").  

The Mütter Museum in Philadelphia has a colon that is 28 inches around (a normal colon is 3 inches around)

Elvis did not die of an overdoes of anything.  Elvis died of constipation.  The drugs in his system were not fatal…  they did however, help to slow down the natural colon motility (peristalses). Johnny Cash, Kurt Cobain and Tammy Wynette also struggled with "obstinate constipation" (as Mary called it).

Human papillomavirus causes anal cancer (ew) - it is what killed Farrah Fawcett.  (another reason Not to "go there")

The strains of bacteria in your gut that you're born with pretty much stay with you the rest of your life.  You get them from your mother, mostly, when you're being born.  

Having Clostridium difficile in your gut can be miserable, and cause chronic, severe diarrhea (like 10x a day, wearing diapers severity) in adults. It kills around 16000 Americans a year (4X as many as 9-11)  A fecal matter transplant, from a donor who does not have Clostridium difficile can make your life much more pleasant.   Two weeks after the transplant, the donor & recipient's colon microbial profiles are synchronized.   Fecal transplants have been being done since 1958, have proven to be very effective, but Insurance companies think they are too "icky" and won't cover them.  (better to let 16000 people die annually instead).  Drug companies don't make any money off of them, and have actually lobbied AGAINST such transplants.  

Toxoplasmosis infects rats guts, but needs to be inside of a cat's digest tract to reproduce.  So toxoplasmosis alters the rat's behavior to make it attracted to cat urine, so that the rat can be eaten.   Ingenious, that evolution is!

Hilarious near homophone:  "Lucy in the sky with diamonds" line "the girl with kaleidoscope eyes" ~ "the girl with colitis goes by"  (akin to Jimi H's "excuse me, while kiss this guy!")  

Probiotics - unless they are shipped in oxygen-free packaging and administered directly to the gut without any oxygen - are not probiotic.  Natural human gut microbes are anaerobic, and exposing them to oxygen kills them.  

Most people eat about 30 different things in their diet - humans are creatures of habit.  While some of us have wily varying food stuffs that we eat and drink, most Americans have about 30 different foods that are their "go to" choices.

[and if Mary Roach or her publicist are visiting this web page and reading this...  please let me know if 
a) I got anything wrong
b) you'd like me to redact any of the information
c) you thought what I gleaned from the vast information presented by Gulp was 'weird']

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Creationism Is Making US Dumber

This is disgusting.

Distorted views being taught to impressionable children.  These "Christian" madrases in the US are doing a disservice to the nation.  "Blue Ridge Academy" in Landrum SC...   DDF and I used to live just a few miles from there.  A "100%" - that's a perfect score in fictional history.  Saudi Arabia would be proud.  ANyone in the USA who subscribes to this literal mis-interpretation of "The Bible" is frankly, delusional, and needs to seek therapy immediately.

Friday, June 14, 2013

Grammar & Accuracy Matters: Then?

I was driving along Golden Lantern in Dana Point earlier this month, when I saw this license plate holder in front of me.  "My wife is better then yours".  Well, first of all, that's just stupid.  That Corolla driver has never met Dr Desert Flower, and she is the best wife in the world, so wrong on the premise.  But look more closely, "then yours" indicates the driver doesn't understand the difference between "than" and"then" (it's simple, google it, Corolla guy).  But if I assumed this was intentionally grammatically structured as accurate, and that the driver was implying "First of all, my wife is better, then, your wife may be 2nd best" he's lacking a comma, so that is not accurate either.  Another failure of the American education system.

It is nice to drive around California and see very few "Truth Fish", W, "Rhino Hunter" or anti-Darwinian  placards besmirching my field of vision when I am at a stop light or parking lot (as there always were in GA, SC, and Arizona).  There's alot more "Hope", Obama/Biden, Evolve Fish, Wiccan, Coexist, Surfer, and laid back emblems, stickers, plate holders, and placards.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Bee Venom Kills HIV

I know this sounds silly, but it is not.  It is sound science, and honestly, it is freaking amazing.   Joshua Hood, a scientist at Washington University (St Louis), took bee venom, loaded with the natural toxin melittin, and put it in nano-particles (he's a Phd MD, but we won't hold the "MD" part against him).  Link here.  The nano-particles were so large, that the normal cells could not get affected by the toxic melittin.   The melittin couldn't harm the normal cells, because they were TOO BIG.  But HIV is a sneaky little virus, encapsulated, with it's own little defense mechanism.

Well HIV, meet BEES!   That's right, Bees!  And the melittin in the bee venom stung the hell out of the HIV, poking holes in it, rendering it useless, while leaving the normal cells unaffected.  Hood hopes to develop a vaginal cream that is loaded with these nano particles that can be applied by women in areas rampantly affected by HIV - like Africa, Haiti, and other hot spots.

This is Science at its best.   Nano-particles, geometry, virology, immunology, biochemistry.  I bet none of the researchers who worked on this think the Earth is 6000 years old.  This is awesome.   This is - as my long deceased grandmother used to say "the bee's knees".  =)

I've been stung by bees, twice in my life, once between my fingers, and once on my arm.  No fun either time.   I was sorry to see the poor bee die, but she stung me.   I know bee venom is no laughing matter. I am delighted to see it stinging the hell out of HIV.